He grabbed me by my shoulders, and locked eyes with me. I had never seen him so serious, his pupils were almost shaking. This was going to be important, I remember the tone of his voice and the stare of his piercing green eyes, as he said, “They want to hurt you, you hear me? They want to stick things in your ass, and hurt you. That’s all they care about, especially with how young you are. They target teens. Do you get that?”
I’ve always wanted to act.
I was in drama from grade school all the way up to college. I was good at it, and I am finding out lately how much I miss it. I mentioned to someone that I should move to LA after high school, really try to give it a shot.
“Do acting. Try it. I believe in you. Go for it….but, only in Reno. LA has too many problems”
Well, of course. It’s universal knowledge that Reno is known for their role in the movie industry, right?
- The famous Hollywood sign up on Peavine.
- Being able to see famous stars shop on the 4th St shops.
- Billy Wilder’s classic movie, “McCarran Blvd”
- The Black Dahlia dying outside of Hobey’s casino in Sun Valley.
Of course Reno is no place to act, yet alone start a career in film. He knew that. This person was deeply worried though. So he told me…about the illusive LA homosexual.
Wait, gay people? Isn’t there a pretty nasty Crips vs. Bloods war going on in LA? Isn’t the entire LA area on a huge fault line, with severe earthquake possibilities? A very high crime rate per capita? Insane traffic that poses a threat every time I enter a vehicle?
“I wouldn’t worry about that, just beware of men who enjoy the music of Cher. That’s a loaded gun without a safety…oh, and Mexicans are bad.”
All gay men-
- Will beat you up and injure you if you don’t fuck them.
- They have no business being around children.
- Will steal from you after befriending you.
- Are serial killers.
- Have two penises; one that injects venom to paralyze you, and the other to penetrate you where you poop.
Besides that last fact, which I obviously made up, this is the information I was told. I had to be 11 or 12 years old during this hour-long conversation that happened. I ate nearly 3 Bagel Dogs during this homophobic lesson. Nothing like a little wiener-to-mouth-stuffing irony to get you through a hate spewed lesson.
I knew nothing about gay people, I knew nothing about anything sexual. I still thought that to get a girl pregnant you peed in her bagina. There was no gay-loving compass at that time. However, this was the first time I realized the effect and spreading of fear. I was getting a lesson in it at that exact moment.
Here’s a list of fears at that time in my life:
- The Dark
- The amount of erections I would get in class.
- No desk or binder to hide said erection.
- The entire movie “Event Horizon.”
- Stores being out of the drink, ‘Surge.’
This was a new kind of fear, this person was terrified. Angry. There was no rationality, this is how it is, Steven.
Don’t get infected. In fact, here are some safety tips if you come across one of these evil creatures:
- quickly get to a rinse station and wash yourself in Stetson cologne.
- Wear a cross made from two sawed-off shotguns.
- Never watch the Bravo network…after midnight.
- Don’t drink the bottled, mineral water.
- If one bites you, you only have 6 hours to get to a Cabela’s and reverse the spell.
I remember it all. I didn’t speak up, but I could feel it.
It wasn’t rationally disagreeing. It was a warning, instructing me on how to avoid gays like it was some kind of bear infiltrating my campsite.
“Don’t just lay there and play dead, that’ll attract em”
No, that’ advice for avoiding a necrophiliac, not a gay person.
“They like them young.”
No, that’s a pedophile.
“They want to hurt and assault you.”
No, that’s a douchebag.
This person was instructing me on something that didn’t exist, and might as well have been given me a step-by-step tutorial on how to preform CPR on a unicorn. People are usually afraid of something they don’t understand, which brings me to my next point: Fuck Soduku.
The topic and writing defending homosexuality is no secret to people. I’m not exploring any uncharted territory with this entry. I’m not saying anything new or starting a revolution, and I’m definitely not blowing your fucking mind.
All I am saying is that the instinct to go gay-snipe hunting wasn’t fooling me when I first heard it. I saw the strings being pulled. I knew who was Santa. I was smart enough to realize that you ‘don’t have my nose.’
I wonder if there is science of heterosexuals having the ‘accepting of gays’ genes, however, it is a choice now, like it was then. For me, this is about being introduced to something with no built in opinion on it…and immediately knowing in my heart, what I believed was right.
..and to the person who told me this information, I must admit we have one thing in common; we’re both deathly afraid of a person we don’t understand shoving something down our throats.