“Are you off your meds?”

Why?

“Because you’re screaming at me for no reason…and you’re naked.”

I may have forgotten to take my meds.

“How long?”

About 3 days.

“What the hell, Steve?! Are you serious? Do you know how long it’s going to take you to get your refill?”

I don’t know, I am out of refills. It may take a few days for UNR to fax over the script to my pharmacy. I’ll be cool.

“You are still naked.”

I’m chill. In fact, I think I will go for a run.

My girlfriend is pissed, again, and she has every right to be. Because being off my meds, even for one day, means that it will take at least five days to regain normalcy…and it’s a rough five days. The fact that I haven’t been on medication for three days makes it even worse because that means for eight days she will have to put up with, ‘Less serotonin Steve.’

Less serotonin Steve is a dick.

Less serotonin Steve will-

• Yell for no reason.
• Scream for no reason.
• Punch walls.
• Naked.
• Become agoraphobic and lock himself indoors.
• Naked.
• Cry. A lot.
• Self medicate with alcohol.
• Suffer severe panic attacks.
• Have depression that involves suicidal thoughts.
• and naked.

I’m on 40mg of a drug called, Cylexa, which is pretty much a $4 version of Lexapro, a mild anti-depressant and anti-anxiety.

It doesn’t hold back everything my body naturally wants to do, but it does the trick. It makes me functional, and content. It also makes everyone else around me a lot happier.

I love my medication, I seriously don’t know what I would do without it, and here is why that fucking sucks.

Fuck the prescription drug companies, and fuck their industry.

I’m a rebel!

Stick it to the man, Steve.

Time to start a revolution! Hoor-ah!  Rise up!

WE ARE ALL PUPPETS AND PFIZER’S CONTROLLING THE STRINGS, MAN!

Drug companies make you believe you are sick and then sell you snake-oil! Take off the blindfold America, and see the truth!

Viva La Revolution!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wait a minute-

Oh, shit. I forgot that during this afternoon’s rise-up, the pollen count is ‘very high’ for today, my allergies are going to flare up like a mad-man. Anyone got any Allegra? Maybe some Claritin?

I can’t protest drug companies without a decent anti-histamine, am I right?

I tried everything before I started taking my medication-

• I ran everyday.
• Worked out at the gym.
• Saw a therapist.
• Focused on school
• Masturbated like the world was ending
• Etc.

I finally gave in to drugs.

Down with corporations and capitalism, right?

I had friends tell me that I didn’t need them.

“I use to take those same pills, man. Don’t do it. It’s only bad news.”

Well, I will only do it for a few months and then quit. Ya know, once I’m stable enough on my own.

My routine with the pills I take completes a circle of stability.

Drugs alone won’t help anything.

Psychiatry alone won’t help anything.

Exercising won’t help anything.

But with those powers combined, I’m like some kind of bi-polar Captain Planet.

I get it though.

Drug companies are bad, yes, we all agree that restless leg syndrome is a hilarious punchline.

However, when it comes to having to take a pill once-a-day so that I don’t have thoughts of throwing myself off of a bridge while in traffic, I’ll take it.

I’m no advocate for medication.

I’m no advocate against it.

I’m just a very unstable bastard who gets by because someone in a lab came up with a little white pill that puts the correct amount of serotonin in my brain.

I’m just Steve.

You get your weekly dose of me every Thursday- ,Side effects may include but not limited to: sarcasm, erections lasting over 8 hours, a superiority complex, smugness, agreeing with me, disagreeing with me, headache, nausea, diarrhea, high B.A.C., preachiness, and gas.